How to achieve your goals

Good intentions are great - but what sounds so inspiring at first often fails in the long-term implementation and in many cases ends in frustration. In order to achieve goals and sustainably increase physical and mental well-being, certain tools are needed to get there. Mavie has four helpful tips for you.

Formulate goals positively, avoiding the word "not".

Our subconscious blocks the word "not". So if we formulate goals based on not wanting something, the negatively experienced state is stored. "I don't let myself be stressed anymore" becomes "I let myself be stressed". That is why it makes sense to formulate goals positively.

Ask yourself the following questions:
• How do I want to be?
• How do I want to feel?
• How am I when I have reached my goal?

Ultimately, this results in the basis for a goal that uses the present and describes a desired state. An example would be: "I calmly master my everyday life" or "I pay attention to my body and my needs". 

Putting yourself in the target state in as many facets as possible and ideally every day

We often tend to think in terms of deficits. That means: We focus on what is not yet successful, i.e. what we cannot yet do. For example, our thoughts keep wandering to the chocolate that we didn’t want to eat. It is a well-known fact that thoughts turn into actions and “we won't start with our good intentions until tomorrow” or file them early in the “failed” folder.

Break this negative spiral by putting yourself in the desired state with as much detail as possible. 

The following questions provide guidance:
• How do you feel in the desired state?
• How do you move?
• What do you see, hear, feel, smell, taste?
• What thoughts do you think in the desired state?
• How do you react to your environment?
• How would others notice a change in you?

It's best to repeat this exercise every day and keep trying to pretend you're already where you want to be. You will notice that your perception, and with it the filter with which you classify your experiences, will also change.

You can use visual reminders such as photos or positively formulated guiding principles to remind you of the target state. These should be placed in a place where they will pass several times a day. If you want to keep these reminders to yourself, a reminder on your phone can also be an option.

Record and consciously celebrate successes

Our brain is comparable to a beaten track. Paths that we often walk are bigger and easier to walk than those that are still unexplored and overgrown. As humans, we tend to choose the usual or easy path. However, this can be different from the one that is good for us in the long term. In order for change to take place, it is usually necessary to break through old patterns. This can succeed if we divide our goal into small steps and thus small success stories. 

Here is a suggestion on how you can consciously record your successes:

 Have a jar ready and fill it with achievement stones, buttons, or something similar. Every evening (or directly in the situation) think about where you got one step closer to your goal. If your goal is to master everyday life more calmly, then that would be, for example: I deliberately took time for a break. Each success stone symbolizes a sense of achievement. What have you wanted to treat yourself to for a long time? When the glass is full, reward yourself with it. 

Don't let relapses discourage you! 

"Failed again, now it's no use anyway." This all-or-not-at-all reaction fuels self-doubt. In the case of an immediate, radical change in the entire lifestyle, failure is usually inevitable. You can choose otherwise. Be patient with yourself, develop useful habits that will help you achieve your goals, and only involve small changes at first.

This can be, for example, briefly observing the sky in the morning, or incorporating a breathing exercise before looking at the cell phone. Incidentally, these new habits can also be fun, for example when you go dancing to relieve stress. The process of change is never linear. Try to think of it as a journey that ultimately is about fitting you and your needs.